Thursday, March 29, 2007


Do you remember I mentioned an interview a while back? Well, I got the job. They said it was because I was clean-shaven.

Wednesday, March 28, 2007

For those of you struggling with your weight, I know how you feel.
I weigh less then I ever have in my life. When I was born, I weighed a little over 7 pounds. Now I am just over six. I am exaggerating slightly for effect. Either the scale in the locker room is wrong or I weigh less than I did when I graduated from high school – and that was in the eighties. We were all pretty big then, spending all that extra money we had courtesy of Reaganomics on rich, high-fat foods.

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

Tuesday, March 20, 2007


I think I had one all night last night. I suppose saying, “I think I had a migraine,” is something like saying, “I think I had an orgasm,” you'd know it if you had one. But last night I had a strange visual presence occupying my peripheral vision. It actually scared me so I went right to bed. I slowly became aware, in my half sleep, of a headache developing. It was going strong by morning and only started to let up after my morning ablution.

Wednesday, March 14, 2007


Someday soon I would like to take all my possessions and drive them to a central location, perhaps an airplane hanger in Wendover, Utah. And then I would like to spread the items out and commence to categorize them into “Must Keep,” “Want,” “Should Keep,” “Donate,” “Dispose.” If I am missing a category let me know. That is my idea of a good time. This undertaking would require the renting or barrowing of a large vehicle of trailer to fit my considerable belongings. It would also require picking stuff up from the East coast, the Midwest and the West coast. A partial list of the stuff includes: clothes, blankets (or blanket), dishes, letters, bits of paper, iPod, laptop, pencils, pens, inkpads, rubber stamps, change (pennies, nickels, dimes and so forth), some foreign money, passport, drivers license, fishing license, school ID cards, year books, shoes, books, a chair, sleeping bag, tent, camping stoves, oil, bicycles, bird nests, three or four hummingbirds, a Scarlet tanager, a bat, a cat head, a Barred owl, some carpet squares, (there is a woman sitting on the floor who appears to be drawing my portrait), two watches, records, CDs, two battery operated record players, two record players that do not take batteries, cameras, negatives, binders, slides, super 8 projector, regular 8 projectors, rocks, minerals, skulls of unknown small mammals, fingernail clippers, fireworks, ice skates, (I think the woman really is drawing a picture of me), phone charger, cell phone, rice cooker, steak knives, egg slicer, potato ricer, pocket knife, .22 rifle, sunglasses, fishing rods, reels, lures, hooks, weights, flies, measuring tape, two hammers, hex wrenches, receipts, three cowboy hats, bike helmet, three belts, two bags of sand, a pickup truck, Marshall Oils, grooming kit, two tooth brushes, magazines, three bike pumps, an old tube radio with phonograph, skateboard, photographs, slide viewer, light-box, rocks, minerals, three backpacks, a canvas bag with shoulder strap.

Monday, March 12, 2007


Whispering may be more distracting that talking out loud.

Thursday, March 08, 2007