Tuesday, February 20, 2018

Headache

Many years ago and for decades - half of the sixties, all of the seventies, eighties and nineties, I was headache free. Everyday I reveled in my ache free head. There were other activities, events and occurrences that marked my childhood, sure, but none so important as the daily lack of pain in my head. Until about five or six years ago when it changed. I was typing evaluations for students. But they increasingly made less and less sense. I tried typing slower and more carefully but it made no difference. I thought maybe I was having a stroke. I rode my bike to the doctor. On the way there, I was losing peripheral vision. I made it to the doctor and while a nurse asked me about my medical history etc, pain started and grew, and grew. Unbearable pain (I am a man and I know how to not bear pain as well as the next guy). Eventually I got a shot of a strong pain killer. I slept for about 18 hours and was ok for about a year. Then a similar event happened. It became about a yearly event, these headaches. But in the last ten days I have had three.

I wrote the above last spring. I've only had a couple migraines since then.

There's a neurologist in town who specializes in migraines. It takes a reference and months to see him. When I arrived at his office there was a survey I was instructed to take. The questions were like this: On a scale from 1-10 how much pain are you in now? On a scale from 1- 10 how much pain have you been in the last week? Or, how many migraines have you had in the last week? How many migraines have you had in the last ten days? How many migraines have you had in the last month? That's as far back as it goes. My headaches may be the worst thing in my life but not bad enough. There are people who deal with it every week or even every day. Mostly women because men can't deal with this much pain.

This is what worries me: my neurologist prescribed a rescue drug and says "I use this and it works in about an hour and a half."It's not the hour and half that worries me. It's that he still gets migraines. I don't want my migraine doctor to suffer from migraines any more than I want to go to a flabby personal trainer. Physician heal thyself and then heal me.

The only pain I had during the visit was my sciatic nerve. The physician's assistant has the same sciatic problem. He said to let him know if I find anything that works. I like to imagine doctors have the inside track of miracle cures. Maybe that's more of a perk for clergy types.

I was hoping to be one of those people who humble brags about how great his life is (Damn, got to go to the gallery and pick up a check for my sold out exhibition. When will they learn about direct deposit?!?!), not a guy who keeps getting older and complains about his latest aches and pains.

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